After thousands of female fans across the country gathered to see Magic Mike XXL this opening weekend, AMC was forced to close its doors due to flooding. Says AMC spokesperson Don Peters, “Yeah it was um… unexpected. Those women really enjoyed themselves.”
Authorities are saying that every theater showing Magic Mike XXL was affected by the disaster, costing AMC upwards of 2 million dollars to replace the now soaked, unusable seats. Lucas Williams, a manager at the AMC Cineplex in downtown St. Louis, has already begun the process of rebuilding: “We’re just calling it ‘water damage’ on the insurance forms. But… yeah, you know. It’s not water.”
Peters says that it was simply more liquid than their facilities were capable of handling: “We have a full time janitorial staff with mops and everything, but we forgot that the movie is basically just 5 Channing Tatums acting out every woman’s deepest fantasy. So, yeah, the mops just weren’t enough. To soak up the, um… the water?”
At least one employee suffered minor injuries when he was swept away by the river of liquid, at some points rushing at over 40 mph.
Renovations, including an extensive irrigation system and ten-foot “screen splash guards” are expected to be completed by 2017, in time for the release of 50 Shades Darker.