Imploring Catholics to seek forgiveness from marginalized groups including homosexuals and women, Pope Francis — the Cool Pope — reminded reporters that he is still very much the Cool Pope in an interview aboard the papal airplane this past weekend.
“I think that the church not only should apologize to the person who is gay whom it offended, but it must also apologize to the poor as well, to the women who have been exploited, to children who have been exploited by (being forced to) work. It must apologize for having blessed so many weapons,” the Cool Pope told reporters Sunday on a flight from from Armenia to Rome, which also sounds cool as hell.
In true Cool Pope fashion, the Cool Pope almost lamed up the joint with a bunch of Jesus stuff before basically reiterating that he’s just the coolest version of a big-time Jesus guy, if that’s what you’re into. Like, on one hand he’s definitely the Pope, but on the other: pretty cool. Together, that makes for one Cool Pope.
The Cool Pope added that LGBT people in particular “must not be discriminated against, that they must be respected and accompanied pastorally” – a statement which one would hope is the norm in 2016 rather than some radical act of coolness, but hey. Pretty cool for a pope.