Facebook will take measures to remove fake news stories from peoples’ news feeds, Mark Zuckerberg announced this morning while consuming a live dolphin.
“Untrue or inaccurate stories should not be allowed on our platform,” Zuckerberg said, in between bites of dolphin. “From now on, if you see a story shared on Facebook, rest assured that it will be accurate.
Zuckerberg reportedly captured the dolphin with his bare hands while diving in the Atlantic Ocean, several reputable sources told us. He then dragged it to his press conference so he would have something to munch on while he told everybody about the new Facebook policies.
“Don’t worry, we’ve got this under control,” he said. “Now watch me be a dolphin man.” Zuckerberg then climbed inside of the dolphin in an attempt to wear its skin like a suit. He ended up just rolling around on the ground a bunch.
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