In a statement on Facebook, deeply conservative television personality Glenn Beck shocked the world by claiming a vote for Hillary Clinton would be “a moral, ethical choice.” While Beck’s right-wing fans felt betrayed, no one was more upset than Democrats.
Beck, who is known for his outrageous and often bizarre political commentary, has rattled Democrats so much that they are beginning to question the fabric of reality around them.
“If this certified GOP stumper believes voting for Hillary is the better choice, what does that say about us? What is real?” questioned the normally composed Elizabeth Warren, as she inexplicably pressed her hands along the wall with a crazed expression. “Are we in the Upside-Down?”
Democrats are convinced that they must have slipped into a dark and terrifying alternate reality, as that seems to be the only reasonable explanation.
“We’re going to get out of this place,” cried a distraught Tim Kaine, as he rocked back and forth clutching a string of blinking Christmas lights.
It’s understandable that Democrats would be shaken by this recent development. After all, Beck has on various occasions said 9/11 victims should “shut up,” celebrated forest fires in California for targeting people who hate America, and has literally stated, “I am on the verge of moral collapse at any time.”
Clinton herself was left baffled, saying at a rally, “It is far more plausible to me that we have somehow ended up in a parallel dimension depicted in a Netflix show than that Glenn Beck has developed even the slightest hint of affection for me.”