Despite her role in co-creating of the forthcoming Nickelodeon animated series Kuu Kuu Harajuku as well as voicing a character named DJ Suki in this year’s Trolls film, genealogists have come to the conclusion that pop singer Gwen Stefani is still not Japanese.
Gwen’s overwhelming whiteness was confirmed by looking at any picture ever taken of her.
“Unfortunately, people can’t become Japanese just by getting really into Japanese culture,” Dr. Naomi Sato explained Wednesday, after a prolonged sigh. “At least the girls in that cartoon look Caucasian like Ms. Stefani? Or actually, that might be worse.”
When reached for comment on the findings, Gwen Stefani only blushed and daintily put a hand to her mouth behind an ornate paper fan.