Mama mia, mi so excited to-a see an authentico hip-hop concert, especially one featuring mi a-favorite hip-hop star, Eminem! Bene! All the other pizza men at mi pizzeria chipped in-a some money to buy me a ticket for-a mi birthday, and-a now here I am. I have worn-a mi finest toque and chef whites for-a this occasion, and-a the show is about to begin. Alla buon’ora! Viva Eminem! Mi hope-a he does-a the song about spaghetti!

You see, when I first a-start mi pizzeria, things were-a very difficile indeed. The people, they did not-a know if we were a pizzeria, a trattoria, or a ristorante! Ohimè! For months, nobody come-a to mi pizzeria at all. Dio ce ne scampi e liberi! The beautiful music of Eminem was-a always there for mi though, and-a no song more so than-a his famous song about his a-mama’s spaghetti. Bravo, Eminem! Bravo! This song, it-a make me feel like I was-a back in the old country with my own mama, eating a-spaghetti and-a dreaming of one day opening a pizzeria. The song, she make mi a-realzie that in-a many ways, my dreams had-a already come-a true, and that mi success depended-a only on me!

Evviva, Eminem! Bene! Mi hope-a Eminem does-a this famous spaghetti song tonight at-a the rap concerto.


Ah, a delicioso, rustico pizza… goes perfecto with the music of Eminem!


As-a evidenced by-a mi staff purchasing me this-a ticket, I am now a very successful pizza man, and-a mi pizzeria is celebrated throughout-a the land. This is is due in-a no small part to Eminem and his-a encouraging words. I would-a write him a letter to let him-a know just how much his-a bellissimo music has-a meant to me and mi pizzeria, but I would not-a want to be a “Stan!” Haha, “Stan” from-a the famous Eminem a-song! I shall a-just clap and kiss my saucy fingers to a-show my appreciation.

Mi only wish that-a security did not-a confiscate mi plastic baggie of-a pepperonis at-a the gate, because-a the snacks and drinks here… not only are they-a molto expensive, they don’t even have-a wine or-a limoncello! Che spavento!

Ah! Here-a he comes! Here comes Eminem! Bravo, Eminem! Bravo! Bene! I kiss mi fingers only for-a you!

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