Part of being a good father is taking your illegitimate son to see the Wiggles when they tour. Personally, there is no music that Anthony Field, Lachlan Gillespie, Simon Pryce, and Emma Watkins, make that I emotionally connect with. The Wiggles’ last good album was Yummy Yummy but that was during the golden age when Greg Paige and Murray Cook were still in the band. Their music has really gone downhill since they went mainstream.
That’s why I choose to attend Wiggles concerts with a vape pen in my hand. Nothing like a little vaporous hit of weed to numb my pain and let me experience the children’s music. It’s great because you just get to vibe in a family-friendly environment with no stress. And I checked, there is no law against it. As long as you don’t blow any dank vape juice into a tween’s face you should be fine.
I even asked the Security Guard Moe. So hyped about me having some weed on me he said, “Being high is the only thing keeping me from drowning myself in a urinal.” He liked my idea so much he confiscated my vape and started smoking it himself. Good thing I had my spare vape pen on me. Now I’m faded off the ganja and can’t imagine spending better quality time with my son.
And the best part is that the smoke vapors distract onlookers from all the cocaine I’m doing.