Above Average Presents
You Sound Ridiculous, Call Your Parents

Everyone says millennials are entitled, but have you ever stopped to think about how maybe it’s their parents who are the entitled ones? It’s like they think they’re owed a phone call just because they gave birth to you, paid your college tuition no questions asked, and continue to offer their unconditional support for all your expensive, creative pursuits. But you know what? You owe them none of your time, other than the three seconds it takes to say, “Wire me $3000 now.”

For anyone who’s ever had to talk to their awful parents on the phone, this one’s for you.